The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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