I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
