fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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