I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
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