marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
