I must be too annoying 4 u.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize