I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
