garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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