I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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