I need help removing her.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Randomize
