I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
