im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
