i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
