he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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