OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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