Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
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