She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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