we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Randomize
