smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
