I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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