btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
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