Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
