Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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