its not stalking. its research.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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