Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
