Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Randomize
