Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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