Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Randomize
