I must be too annoying 4 u.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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