Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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