I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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