My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
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Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
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The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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