Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
