dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Randomize