I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
