i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
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