Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Randomize
