I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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