your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Randomize
