she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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