Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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