If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
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