I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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