Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
