party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
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