The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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