just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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