can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
