I didn't shave. On purpose
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Randomize
