I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
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