Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Randomize
