idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
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